In my weekly household garbage patrol, I stopped for the most glamourous task. Armed with a rubber glove, I pulled off the plastic dome that protects us throughout the week from foul feline evidences.
Note: these roll-over 'auto' clean kitty litter boxes... (That's the exact model. The litter box, not the cat.) Don't work. Well, they do... barely. We keep it just because it gives Leela a little privacy. But changing to the clumping-style litter was a good move. A brave hand protected by latex makes short work of it all.
I was about half way done my work in the far corner of the bathroom, when I hear little footsteps behind me, followed by the 'clunk' of wood. I looked behind me; Caitlin was already gone. One of her little wooden chairs I'd painted had appeared.
I turned back to the litter box. Behind me, she reappeared with her other little chair. Then her little dolly highchair. Then three stuffed toys:
Bert, (as in "& Ernie"), which had been mine at her age. In the last 3 decades, Bert had lost all his clothing, and his hair. Baldness hadn't shaken his confidence however, still getting through life his his confident, scrutinizing scowl. Without eyebrows.
Bert had been renamed of late. Caitlin has fallen for a TV show "UmiZoomi". There's no toys relating to this show that I've seen, but she doesn't need them. She just delegated the roles of the main characters to existing toys. Bert was now "Geo", a little blue-clothed fellow with geometric powers who can build anything with his shapes.
The second member of team UmiZoomi was being played by a little pink stuffed bear, which once was named "Berry", and has gone through a few names since then. It was now "Millie", a pink-dressed sister to Geo, whose primary ability is 'pattern power'. Her dress changes to a pattern she needs, then can apply that pattern in various ways. Her secondary power is to extend her pigtails to swing on, or to form rulers. Look out spiderman.
The third and final member was being played by a... an anteater. (Do you remember my
anteater story? Anyway, this anteater gets to play the role of "Bot", a creatively named green robot, whose main ability is... a TV screen on his chest. Which can show anything. In the exotic examples of what he can show, he cites a skyscraper, a taxi cab, and a traffic light. Yay? What happens when Geo hit puberty? How many traffic lights will he be asking Bot to show, huh? anyway, Bot also can act as a storage container, his hands turn into handy little food processors, and yada yada.
UmiZoomi 2025: Bot shows porn, and turns his hands into cityscape leveling maser cannons, while Geo builds nukes, and Millie uses her pattern powers to supply camo, while she swings around like spiderman. Umizoomie 2280? :
Children's TV. Children's TV never changes.
No, well, we're still in 2010, and Caitlin declares the purpose of this Umi-filled gathering as she brings in a box, covered with a little brown silk cloth. "We throw you PARTY, Daddy! Surprise party! Your birthday!"
Well, OK, My birthday is a couple months away, but she recently had her own birthday party, and evidently liked it. Seemingly having gotten over her globapobia, she inflated three imaginary balloons, and set them to rise to the ceiling. I guess she breathes out helium.
She declared the box to be a 'birthday' (cake) and the silk cloth on top to be chocolate icing. I had to blow out the (pre)'tend' candle. Despite being the birthday boy, SHE got the first piece. Me next, then Geo, Millie, and Bot. Then presents. I received imaginary Dora bouncing balls (like a pair she got on her own birthday), a Simpsons driving video game, and a Simpsons game based in space. I have to pretend to play them both. I asked her how old I was. I was informed that I was 'three old'.
Ready for my release from the bathroom, I caught holy heck for trying to move a chair out of the way. It was now time for Caitlin's party. She was also 'three old'. (again). We went through the whole thing again, down the the same three presents.
She was being very cute about the whole thing. I told her, "Sometime you just need to be hugged." Too busy with party arrangements to stop for a hug, she replied, "And sometimes I don't!"
As I feared, Bot, Millie and Geo all needed a party. Thankfully, she threw them one party for all three of them. They were 'three old' as well, by the way. As I type this, she is being tucked in alongside Bot and Geo. Millie couldn't be found. We decided she was out camping.
In other news: Claudia Black. Sorry. I must stop doing that. That is all.
