Gee Mitch, where are your parents, Mitch? Eaten, you say? Intriguing. You even got to see it happen, and hear the screams of your mother as her own blood bubbled up her throat? See? There's a unique experience you can talk about to your school chums. They what? They were eaten too? Oh, some of them were doing the eating. What a diverse group!
-Sarah considering the futility of trying to converse with some people.
I'm at page 98/291 of another editing read before I pass it onto the editing crew. The cover is under some upgrade surgery.. still the same overall idea as the one that I previously posted, just... a bit better.
Joseph Picard's writing projects and life ramblings including the kiddos, and life in a wheelchair.
Friday, May 14, 2010
Monday, May 3, 2010
Echoes of Erebus excerpt - talking with Eidechse
I just thought I'd give a taste of Sarah's conversations with another A.I. later in the book. This section hints at a BIT of a spoiler, buuuut..... here we go.
Oh, note again that the ":::" denotes that the speech is being done electronically in Sarah's skull.
***************
“:::As we have the time, Sarah, can we discuss 'comedy'?” Eidechse asked.
Bit by bit, Sarah had left the visual range of the base. Far enough that through all standard issue scopes and binoculars when used by optimal human eyes. As such, she had begun walking. The terrain was now almost devoid of vegetation, and the rocks were becoming smaller, and less frequent. They were entering sand territory.
“:::Sure Eid. Anything in particular puzzling you?”
“:::Slapstick.”
“:::Humour by means of violence. Hey, how old are you, Eid? Are you telling me no one's discussed humour with you before?”
“:::Not at any length.” Eid ignored that issue, and went back to what was interesting him. “Why is violence funny?
“:::Well... usually slapstick is fairly harmless. Maybe it roots in humiliation. Having someone else look foolish in order to show the viewer that their own natural foolishness it not uncommon.” Damn it, Eidechse had her talking like him. She had to watch that. She certainly didn't want to have the diction of a robot. “I read... well, Amanda read somewhere that humour is mostly based in surprise. An unexpected action, or thought, well timed.”
“:::Aardvark.” Eidechse said.
“:::Excuse me?”
“:::Was that funny? Aardvark. It has no bearing on anything currently happening, and was well timed in my opinion. Did that make it funny?”
Sarah walked along. Aardvark. Aardvark. “:::Maybe a little. Kind of. Not so much. Maybe some relevance to the situation is needed. Wit, sarcasm, irony.”
Eidechse thought for a moment. “:::I wish we had some sand.”
“:::Ah. Sarcasm. Not bad. Tone of voice might have helped that a bit. A human-like tone, maybe exaggerated a little.”
Sounding like a cartoon vampire more than anything, Eidechse called out, “:::I wish we had some sand!!”
That did it. Sarah staggered and laughed vocally. “:::Oh, that's not fair!”
“:::I made you laugh,” Eidechse said, “a genuine laugh? Why was it not fair?”
With a leavened mood, Sarah said “:::I don't know, maybe because it's you! You're not known for humour, and your attempt was kind of overdone. A good attempt, but way overdone!”
“:::I do not understand. If it made you laugh, how is it overdone? If I exaggerated less, would it have been funnier?”
“:::Probably not!”
“:::Then why was it overdone?”
“:::Eid, I was expecting a very human-like voice, and when you took my expectation and blew it up past what I what I thought I would hear, it was a surprise! It was what I told you to do, but not at the same time! That was actually great!”
“I do not understand.”
*******************
A chapter or two later:
“:::How you doing in there, Eid?”
“:::I've been watching movies. I have a question.”
“:::Of course you do. Just one, huh? Fire away.”
“:::Why did people think that crossing two 'streams' of protons would instantaneously stop all life and explode every molecule in a body at the speed of light?”
Sarah coughed. “:::What the hell have you been watching? Is it fact or fiction?”
“:::Fiction. I am still working through the comedy collection.”
“:::Well, that answers your question, Eid. No one actually thought that.”
There was a pause. For Eidechse, it was a very long pause. “:::Are people aware that movies are lying to them, on purpose?”
With a smile, Sarah replied with serenity. “:::Yes, they even pay to be lied to.”
“:::I do not understand.”
Oh, note again that the ":::" denotes that the speech is being done electronically in Sarah's skull.
***************
“:::As we have the time, Sarah, can we discuss 'comedy'?” Eidechse asked.
Bit by bit, Sarah had left the visual range of the base. Far enough that through all standard issue scopes and binoculars when used by optimal human eyes. As such, she had begun walking. The terrain was now almost devoid of vegetation, and the rocks were becoming smaller, and less frequent. They were entering sand territory.
“:::Sure Eid. Anything in particular puzzling you?”
“:::Slapstick.”
“:::Humour by means of violence. Hey, how old are you, Eid? Are you telling me no one's discussed humour with you before?”
“:::Not at any length.” Eid ignored that issue, and went back to what was interesting him. “Why is violence funny?
“:::Well... usually slapstick is fairly harmless. Maybe it roots in humiliation. Having someone else look foolish in order to show the viewer that their own natural foolishness it not uncommon.” Damn it, Eidechse had her talking like him. She had to watch that. She certainly didn't want to have the diction of a robot. “I read... well, Amanda read somewhere that humour is mostly based in surprise. An unexpected action, or thought, well timed.”
“:::Aardvark.” Eidechse said.
“:::Excuse me?”
“:::Was that funny? Aardvark. It has no bearing on anything currently happening, and was well timed in my opinion. Did that make it funny?”
Sarah walked along. Aardvark. Aardvark. “:::Maybe a little. Kind of. Not so much. Maybe some relevance to the situation is needed. Wit, sarcasm, irony.”
Eidechse thought for a moment. “:::I wish we had some sand.”
“:::Ah. Sarcasm. Not bad. Tone of voice might have helped that a bit. A human-like tone, maybe exaggerated a little.”
Sounding like a cartoon vampire more than anything, Eidechse called out, “:::I wish we had some sand!!”
That did it. Sarah staggered and laughed vocally. “:::Oh, that's not fair!”
“:::I made you laugh,” Eidechse said, “a genuine laugh? Why was it not fair?”
With a leavened mood, Sarah said “:::I don't know, maybe because it's you! You're not known for humour, and your attempt was kind of overdone. A good attempt, but way overdone!”
“:::I do not understand. If it made you laugh, how is it overdone? If I exaggerated less, would it have been funnier?”
“:::Probably not!”
“:::Then why was it overdone?”
“:::Eid, I was expecting a very human-like voice, and when you took my expectation and blew it up past what I what I thought I would hear, it was a surprise! It was what I told you to do, but not at the same time! That was actually great!”
“I do not understand.”
*******************
A chapter or two later:
“:::How you doing in there, Eid?”
“:::I've been watching movies. I have a question.”
“:::Of course you do. Just one, huh? Fire away.”
“:::Why did people think that crossing two 'streams' of protons would instantaneously stop all life and explode every molecule in a body at the speed of light?”
Sarah coughed. “:::What the hell have you been watching? Is it fact or fiction?”
“:::Fiction. I am still working through the comedy collection.”
“:::Well, that answers your question, Eid. No one actually thought that.”
There was a pause. For Eidechse, it was a very long pause. “:::Are people aware that movies are lying to them, on purpose?”
With a smile, Sarah replied with serenity. “:::Yes, they even pay to be lied to.”
“:::I do not understand.”
Thursday, April 29, 2010
I'm not that old yet!! Keep the archaologists away from me and my pen for a while. Also- 'Echeoes of Erebus' excerpt.
I contributed to an article about annoyances with loud TV ads, and in my submission, I referred to myself as a "Cranky old man in training". Because of this, I might sound like an old man. Hey, just an Old man In training! I have the cranky pretty much nailed down, but I'm only a third of a century old! I need to be about twice as old before I legally qualify as 'old'.
It's not a big deal, I guess. When I'm rich and famous, it will just be a bit of amusing trivia for the entertainment TV when they do stories on me, and my vast harem. Archaeologists will be confounded at the inconsistency, then move on to examining how the ink I used to sign books changed when my OFFICIAL SIGNING PEN runs out of ink.
This is a really darn good pen for a disposable mind you. It's been chugging for years. I only use it for signing though. Why have I declared such a pen? Just to give archaeologists something to talk about.
Time for another Echoes of Erebus excerpt- roll the tape! (for the record, the first editing pass is half done)
---
“:::Yeah, well... I still don't know that Doug has smartened up at all. A broken wrist doesn't grow more brain cells. In fact, screw the whole job thing. First, I want to leave Doug a message.”
“:::W- what kind of message?” Jon asked.
“:::Nothing harmful. Maybe a short note carved in his front door. I don't know, I'll think of something on the way.”
Sarah changed direction. She didn't dare use her transit pass. They probably had tracking data on them, and the stations had a ton of cameras. Her hair and clothes were different, but her face was still the same.
At least for now. That was something definitely worth thinking about.
Walking past a bank machine, she grabbed a deposit slip and chained pen, and began jotting down a note.
“:::Sarah, you realize the bank machine has a camera staring at you right now.”
“:::Aw, damn. I guess it's kind of inescapable. The rural option is starting to sound better and better. I'll leave Doug's note, then we're off to the hills, I guess.”
Dear Douglas Villa,
I do hope you're healing well. I just wanted to say hi, and that yes, I am watching over Dan, and all her friends. Please play nice. Repeated breakage of the same bones can have long term effects.
“:::Alright, how should I sign it?”
“:::How about FISH GIRL!”
“:::Yeah, no.”
She simply signed it 'Sarah', put the pen back in its little cubby, and continued on her way.
“:::No Fish Girl?” Jon asked.
“:::No Fish Girl.”
“:::How about 'The Defender of the Sea!'”
“:::No. It's done, moving on.”
“:::How about 'The Holy Mackerel?”
“:::Am I going to have to send you to your room?”
Jon rallied his whiniest remorseful voice. “:::I'll be good.”
It's not a big deal, I guess. When I'm rich and famous, it will just be a bit of amusing trivia for the entertainment TV when they do stories on me, and my vast harem. Archaeologists will be confounded at the inconsistency, then move on to examining how the ink I used to sign books changed when my OFFICIAL SIGNING PEN runs out of ink.
This is a really darn good pen for a disposable mind you. It's been chugging for years. I only use it for signing though. Why have I declared such a pen? Just to give archaeologists something to talk about.
Time for another Echoes of Erebus excerpt- roll the tape! (for the record, the first editing pass is half done)
---
“:::Yeah, well... I still don't know that Doug has smartened up at all. A broken wrist doesn't grow more brain cells. In fact, screw the whole job thing. First, I want to leave Doug a message.”
“:::W- what kind of message?” Jon asked.
“:::Nothing harmful. Maybe a short note carved in his front door. I don't know, I'll think of something on the way.”
Sarah changed direction. She didn't dare use her transit pass. They probably had tracking data on them, and the stations had a ton of cameras. Her hair and clothes were different, but her face was still the same.
At least for now. That was something definitely worth thinking about.
Walking past a bank machine, she grabbed a deposit slip and chained pen, and began jotting down a note.
“:::Sarah, you realize the bank machine has a camera staring at you right now.”
“:::Aw, damn. I guess it's kind of inescapable. The rural option is starting to sound better and better. I'll leave Doug's note, then we're off to the hills, I guess.”
Dear Douglas Villa,
I do hope you're healing well. I just wanted to say hi, and that yes, I am watching over Dan, and all her friends. Please play nice. Repeated breakage of the same bones can have long term effects.
“:::Alright, how should I sign it?”
“:::How about FISH GIRL!”
“:::Yeah, no.”
She simply signed it 'Sarah', put the pen back in its little cubby, and continued on her way.
“:::No Fish Girl?” Jon asked.
“:::No Fish Girl.”
“:::How about 'The Defender of the Sea!'”
“:::No. It's done, moving on.”
“:::How about 'The Holy Mackerel?”
“:::Am I going to have to send you to your room?”
Jon rallied his whiniest remorseful voice. “:::I'll be good.”
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Editing of Echoes of Erebus is underway....!
Writing the first draft of Echoes of Erebus was fun. READING IT (first editing pass) at a more "readerly" pace is a blast. I get to see the events unfold in 'real time'. It's a fun story. Y'all gonna love it.
Happily, I'm nicely on pace for release in time for this October's VCON (Vancouver sci fi convention)... DESPITE not rushing. If you count the 2d edition of Lifehack that came out 3 years ago, this October will mark a 'hat-trick' of releases at VCON.
My volunteer editing team has grown, from 4 on Watching Yute, to 7, one of which is the blessedly brutal Julie Anne Dawson. I didn't agree with all of the points she made about Watching Yute... some I did, some I didn't, some I sat some0hwere in the middle on after much deliberation.
Oh, also, one of the new editors, my cousin, Jacqueline 'Jackie' Shaben has kind of become a model for the cover. Her hand did, anyway. The outline of her hand. Glam? Youbetcha.
Any way, my plan is to finish the 2nd half of my first editing pass, tweak the start and the epilogue, do another editing pass, then hand if off to the editors while I finalize the cover. Simple, yes? Yes.
People have been asking for another excerpt, and as I've been doing this editing pass, I've been keeping my eyes out for an candidate. Soon. -ish.
Happily, I'm nicely on pace for release in time for this October's VCON (Vancouver sci fi convention)... DESPITE not rushing. If you count the 2d edition of Lifehack that came out 3 years ago, this October will mark a 'hat-trick' of releases at VCON.
My volunteer editing team has grown, from 4 on Watching Yute, to 7, one of which is the blessedly brutal Julie Anne Dawson. I didn't agree with all of the points she made about Watching Yute... some I did, some I didn't, some I sat some0hwere in the middle on after much deliberation.
Oh, also, one of the new editors, my cousin, Jacqueline 'Jackie' Shaben has kind of become a model for the cover. Her hand did, anyway. The outline of her hand. Glam? Youbetcha.
Any way, my plan is to finish the 2nd half of my first editing pass, tweak the start and the epilogue, do another editing pass, then hand if off to the editors while I finalize the cover. Simple, yes? Yes.
People have been asking for another excerpt, and as I've been doing this editing pass, I've been keeping my eyes out for an candidate. Soon. -ish.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Echoes of Erebus - light at the end. Of the first draft...
Quttin time. I reached my target for today of 5 pages. (being a lower target than yesterday's 10 due to other things that needed to be done)
I'm solid into the mop-up/epilogue section now. I'm at 225 pages right now, and expect another 10 to reach the end, I guess. When page breaks and other formatting are put in, I'll probably be around the size of Watching Yute, which finalized at 256.
Man, 3 am gets pretty hot with a laptop on your chest and a cuddly cat around your ankles. I could write a little more, but I think I'll chill a bit, pass out and wake up fresh to attack tomorrow's target. I'd be happy with 7, but I'm hoping for ten. Or the end of the story, whichever comes first.
I worked in another cameo...! A logical one too, right near the end.. not some "LOL HI! I'M FROM A PREVIOUS BOOK, HI HI HI, OK THX BAI!"
Ok. Thx. Gnite.
I'm solid into the mop-up/epilogue section now. I'm at 225 pages right now, and expect another 10 to reach the end, I guess. When page breaks and other formatting are put in, I'll probably be around the size of Watching Yute, which finalized at 256.
Man, 3 am gets pretty hot with a laptop on your chest and a cuddly cat around your ankles. I could write a little more, but I think I'll chill a bit, pass out and wake up fresh to attack tomorrow's target. I'd be happy with 7, but I'm hoping for ten. Or the end of the story, whichever comes first.
I worked in another cameo...! A logical one too, right near the end.. not some "LOL HI! I'M FROM A PREVIOUS BOOK, HI HI HI, OK THX BAI!"
Ok. Thx. Gnite.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Echoes of Erebus first draft nearing completion
I'm roughly forty pages away, and with no toddler around in the next week or so, I have a lot of opportunity to do it. I'm not saying it WILL be done in the next week, but it's very possible.
I have recently threatened to drop Sarah 17 stories, and chop her roughly in half. I'm not sure how she'd deal with those situations, and neither is she. Thankfully she managed to think her way out of both threats in fun ways. Right now I have her deep underground. She just dealt with a boobytrap and some Erebus-grade opponents,all while struggling with visibility issues. Light amplification won't help much when there's no light to amplify.
An 'Erebus-grade' creation comes in two varieties depending on the mood of the creator at the time. Effective, or 'unique'. Those two categorizations sometimes overlap, but an effective design will be re-used, making the creature much less unique. Case in point being the common zombie. Sure, you can do artistic things WITH zombies, but this often reduces their effectiveness.
The cover I posted last time has been changed... at least there's another draft in the mix now. Same general idea, but somewhat darker blues.
In other news, I ran into a review of Lifehack that I wasn't aware of before. It was pretty darn complimentary, and illustrates how I need to stop chasing after reviewers who I know to be tough as nails, and let some gentler readers have a crack at it now and then.
I've also been interviewed for another website, thought I'm not sure when it will be posted. You can bet I'll pop the link up when it happens!
I've gotten 'clearance' to do a signing event in a local coffee shop. I just need to pick my saturday, do a little promo work, and it'll be done. The manager was quite open to the idea... it makes me think I should try some other coffee shops, and do these kinds of things until I need to reorder for my personal stock.
In other other news, I just had a sneezing fit so violent, I now smell blood.
In other other other news, my cat is going bat-poopie insane, and just clobbered herself by running into a doorframe at mach 47.
I have recently threatened to drop Sarah 17 stories, and chop her roughly in half. I'm not sure how she'd deal with those situations, and neither is she. Thankfully she managed to think her way out of both threats in fun ways. Right now I have her deep underground. She just dealt with a boobytrap and some Erebus-grade opponents,all while struggling with visibility issues. Light amplification won't help much when there's no light to amplify.
An 'Erebus-grade' creation comes in two varieties depending on the mood of the creator at the time. Effective, or 'unique'. Those two categorizations sometimes overlap, but an effective design will be re-used, making the creature much less unique. Case in point being the common zombie. Sure, you can do artistic things WITH zombies, but this often reduces their effectiveness.
The cover I posted last time has been changed... at least there's another draft in the mix now. Same general idea, but somewhat darker blues.
In other news, I ran into a review of Lifehack that I wasn't aware of before. It was pretty darn complimentary, and illustrates how I need to stop chasing after reviewers who I know to be tough as nails, and let some gentler readers have a crack at it now and then.
I've also been interviewed for another website, thought I'm not sure when it will be posted. You can bet I'll pop the link up when it happens!
I've gotten 'clearance' to do a signing event in a local coffee shop. I just need to pick my saturday, do a little promo work, and it'll be done. The manager was quite open to the idea... it makes me think I should try some other coffee shops, and do these kinds of things until I need to reorder for my personal stock.
In other other news, I just had a sneezing fit so violent, I now smell blood.
In other other other news, my cat is going bat-poopie insane, and just clobbered herself by running into a doorframe at mach 47.
Friday, March 19, 2010
Echoes of Erebus civer draft (and misc news)
Here it is, bask and enjoy. Breakdown after the images....
That's our lass Sarah. She doesn't actually have cable plugs, or visible circuitry on her arm, but hey. Metaphor. Cheap flashy metaphor. The one cable with the loose plug does loop around her arm and end with a bleeding fishing hook. For those that haven't been paying attention, or haven't skipped to the 2nd image, yes, Sarah is made out of fish. She does not do any fishing herself, nor draw much in the way of blood. In the lower left we see a bit of my 'mascot nanite'. We'll talk about him in a bit.
The full wrap for the cover. Here we see more of mascot nanite.. he is positioned so that the 3 books, when set together, will make him in whole on your bookshelf. Whee! I'm witty! No, but moving on....
New author photo.. might replace it again. Mildly modified author blurb, and up top, well.. click the pic if you have trouble reading that. I left a lot of 'white space'... hm. We'll see.
As for the writing itself, I'm on quite a binge. This week has been compromised by a lot of random stuff going on, but I had been getting 2o pages a week on the first draft for 3? weeks in a row. This week might be more like 15.. which I hope doesn't mess up my general momentum. (or count). Yeah, 20 pages a week might seem like a lot to anyone who's tried it, and... it is. What I end up with will need a lot of work, but this phase is the most stressful, I think.
Current pagecount, (with no chapter breaks and such put in) 158. I'm hoping the final will be close to Watching Yute's 256, but we'll see.
I've been burning the midnight oil a lot in this past month, staying up til 1 am, (or later.. once or twice to 3 am) which makes for a lonnnnnng next day when Caitlin gets me up at around 7.
I gots a seekrit:
That's our lass Sarah. She doesn't actually have cable plugs, or visible circuitry on her arm, but hey. Metaphor. Cheap flashy metaphor. The one cable with the loose plug does loop around her arm and end with a bleeding fishing hook. For those that haven't been paying attention, or haven't skipped to the 2nd image, yes, Sarah is made out of fish. She does not do any fishing herself, nor draw much in the way of blood. In the lower left we see a bit of my 'mascot nanite'. We'll talk about him in a bit.
The full wrap for the cover. Here we see more of mascot nanite.. he is positioned so that the 3 books, when set together, will make him in whole on your bookshelf. Whee! I'm witty! No, but moving on....New author photo.. might replace it again. Mildly modified author blurb, and up top, well.. click the pic if you have trouble reading that. I left a lot of 'white space'... hm. We'll see.
As for the writing itself, I'm on quite a binge. This week has been compromised by a lot of random stuff going on, but I had been getting 2o pages a week on the first draft for 3? weeks in a row. This week might be more like 15.. which I hope doesn't mess up my general momentum. (or count). Yeah, 20 pages a week might seem like a lot to anyone who's tried it, and... it is. What I end up with will need a lot of work, but this phase is the most stressful, I think.
Current pagecount, (with no chapter breaks and such put in) 158. I'm hoping the final will be close to Watching Yute's 256, but we'll see.
I've been burning the midnight oil a lot in this past month, staying up til 1 am, (or later.. once or twice to 3 am) which makes for a lonnnnnng next day when Caitlin gets me up at around 7.
I gots a seekrit:
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